Platypus Sacrifice Performed at the Acuña Cartel

I thought writing for a cartel boss was painful. Then I got stabbed by a platypus. Twice.

The name’s Jett Turner and my writing about Acuña Cartel head Tito “El Tigre” Calderón has turned my life into a mosaic of absolute insanity. This past month has seen me get poisoned by the aforementioned animal (Yeah, they’re venomous. Look it up!), survive a plane crash, deal with a clowder of feral cats, and go toe-to-toe with a Santería priest and my witch doctor of a housekeeper. Throw in two DEA agents who awarded me Informant-of-the-Month status and won’t leave my pool, a dangerously seductive stewardess, and an Australian who has a bong crafted from a koala skull, and you get an idea of what I’m up against in my want to live a happy semi-retired life.

This third misadventure that is my life is rated R for language, crude humor, and insanely bizarre circumstances but rates an A+ for all of the aforementioned and entertainment value.

Platypus Sacrifice Performed at the Acuña Cartel is Book 3 in the wildly popular Jett Turner Misadventures series. Check out the rest of the books in the series:

Book 1: Tiger Tales from the Acuña Cartel

Book 2: Panda Jelly Served at the Acuña Cartel

Like what you see? Want to keep the adventure going? Fire a PayPal or Venmo in my direction & you may get a shout out! Hot Tip: Include blog idea in the description…

 
 
Gayne C. Young

If you mixed Ernest Hemingway, Robert Ruark, Hunter S. Thompson, and four shots of tequila in a blender, a "Gayne Young" is what you'd call the drink!

https://www.gaynecyoung.com/
Next
Next

Week of January 26, 2026